Wednesday, August 7, 2013

All My Cat's and Their Dramatically Different Personalities

A rambling about my previous & current cats and their dramatically different personalities; political correctness; and age.

Foreword: THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE FUNNY. Because of summertime boredom (which I actually don't mind) and for lack of a better topic, today I'm blogging about cats. Pretty legit, huh? If your my friend and you read this, you get a whole dollar...Just kidding!

So I'm a cat person. Or let me rephrase that. My family consists of cat lovers. I honestly don't think that I'm gonna be "that kid" that's going to go off to college and try to sneak their cat into their dorm and not mind paying dorm damage fees. I could live without them - even though they are an adorable ball of sweet fluffiness just asking for some love with those big green eyes. Or at least I think I could live without them...I don't know that for a fact because theres always been a few cats in my life at a time. At one point, we had as many as 7 at once. But please don't label us as the crazy cat family, that was a long time ago!
 But heres a list of the ones I actually remember (meaning I won't even begin to list the strays that have wandered in and out of our life 'because they don't really count).
Thomas, Billy, Trini, Nosey, Sweety Pie, Miss Priss, Rudy, Missy, Sparky & Lucky, Ellie Mae, and Callie (and be aware that I'm not so great at naming things, especially when I was a little kid. So please don't pay attention to that odd list of names).

  •  Thomas is my cat. I got him when I turned 7. He's super sweet and loves to catch birds and snakes. Sometimes to eat. Sometimes to make my mom mad. Sometimes just to annoy Miss Priss with the fact that she's absolutely useless except for eating us out of the house at home and sleeping and being notorious for making atrocious noises (keep reading to find out more). He also enjoys sleeping. He's pretty dignified for a cat actually, examples of this behaviour include how he drinks his water (rather than lapping it up with his tongue, he makes a teacup with his paw and drinks from it) and the fact that he crosses his ankles whenever he lays down. 
  • Rudy. Not even sure if he counts? My aunt gave him to my grandma because she was moving and my grandma kept him for awhile but then passed him on down the line to me because she couldn't take care of him. I guess he had had a pretty traumatic childhood, and therefore ran away from our place as soon as it realized that my family's crazy. OK, no they aren't. But for some reason, Rudy ran away. 
  • Trini. Please stop laughing...I was only 4 when I got her, so what do  you expect? What 4 year old does come up with a decent name for a pet. It usually is along the lines of what the animal actually is. So my naming an animal after a character from children's book isn't all that tragic. This cat is extremely tiny, shy and sweet and pretty special - besides her, I have yet to meet a cat that has legit bulimia. 
  • Billy. RIP. Really sweet cat. He loved to eat (pretty obvious to any of y'all who knew him. He weighed like 20 lbs) and had a hilarious personality. He died a few years back from kidney failure due to food poisoning. 
  • Sweety Pie. Honestly she needs to be renamed, as this name doesn't suit her at all. My definition of  a sweet cat is one that actually wants human attention. This cat no longer fits that discription. 
  • Nosey. His name was based off of appearances. He was a stray and wandered up with beat up nose and tail-less. He hopped around like a rabbit and chased butterflies (we think he may have been mentally retarded). Like Billy, he  also died from food-poisoning related kidney problems.
  • Missy. The first of 3 cats for my mom to accidentally attract. We ended up with this one while at a city park at a party and it randomly ran up to my mom and jumped in her lap. Since she was obviously a stray and extremely sweet, we brought her home. She lived with us for a year or two and then ran off. Cats have a way of doing that, don't they?
  • Miss Priss.Oh gosh... She's the 2nd of the 3 cats my mom accidentally attracted, and we (my mom and I) really regret it. We were outside doing something and looked across the yard and noticed a large orange cat continually attempting to jump into our neighbor's window. Since it was large and orange, we assumed it was Billy and my mom called it over...and it was not Billy. We didn't want to keep it, it just stayed. And right off the bat it was the most annoying creature to ever walk the planet, with its screeching hollers and feisty personality, ready to bite or scratch you just for being a girl (it is supposedly loving towards the guys, but I have no proof of this). It hates all other cats and has spaz attacks (technically epilepsy I guess), like the time my friend and I were eating dinner and it was inside taking a nap on top of  a bookshelf and it randomly fell off and took off running into walls, bouncing off of them, running in the other direction and repeating the process until it layed down and started flipping over. After a lot of arguments, Miss Priss is finally an outdoor only cat. But she kind of defeats the purpose of an outside cat, which is to kill bugs and snakes. All she does is eat kibble, sleep, attack her siblings, and vomit. Another of her annoying activities include jumping into my window at night to scream and bang on it (literally). I'm not exactly why we keep this cat, but we do because it apparently belongs to my brother and he loves it for some unknown reason. Atleast she's pretty on the outside...
  • Sparky and Lucky. They were my dads cats. I don't really remember much about them because they died or ran off (I'm actually not sure) when I was a toddler. Except that Sparky was feisty and Lucky was sweet, both personalities towards me were probably because I was so young and probably petted them too much and pulled their tails.
  • Ellie Mae and Callie were the grannies of the bunch, meaning they were OLD. Really old. My mom had had them ever since she was single, old. They died when they were about 27 and 25 years old; in people years. Who even came up with cat years anyways!?!?! What point do they serve other than to confuse pet   {oops, sorry. I keep forgetting that thats no longer politically correct.} companion owners? I don't know. But that's not the point of this post. Actually I'm not even sure of the point of this post. I guess it classifies as a rambling that I mentioned would eventually come.
Congratulations, you've joined the boredom club if you seriously just read that entire post. But I at least had fun writing it and really don't care if you don't read it.

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